A Valentine Rap

By Bill Buffie


Jo Ellen,

ValentineThinking of my Valentiney, makes think of your hiney
which makes me think of an ass; admittedly, that sounds a bit crass
But it leads me to rump, and then I’m thinking of Trump!

Guess he’s our president, more like a misplaced White House resident, for which there simply is no precedent
Could go on and on but only to vent, his narcissistic armor likely too thick to dent.

What a terrible Valentine distraction, through executive action mobilizing a faction, with ego-driven satisfaction, using his brain though, it appears, only a fraction.

Executive orders lacking precision, challenges from the media met with derision, our country seemingly on a course for collision, ripe with indecision, many a waffling position
Perhaps only to be cured through executive excision, before we find our Muslim, Hispanic, gay, and transgender brothers and sisters facing a 21st Century Inquisition!

Through a primary season promoting a buffooning primate, sole purpose for his ego to inflate, each debate not even second rate
No small wonder now we find ourselves tied to an ugly fate, unless Congress is willing to fight against hate, unsafe to just take a deep breath and wait.

Surely they won’t succumb to the bum, just because he won; it’s not all done, certainly not fun; if he can be president, then can just anyone? He sets the bar so low with his family in tow; be it Russian collusion or marriage vows just an illusion, promises are made and promises are broken, “Stormy” indiscretions confirm our impressions, as we desperately await Congressional intercessions!

Through attempted judicial castration, he’s raised national indignation, bipartisan frustration, foreign leaders’ condemnation, little prospect for inspiration from one seeking adulation after his self-proclaimed coronation.

Now we head into year two amidst ramblings of Haiti, Africa, and poo; doesn’t he have anything better to do, but disparage third world peoples and their complex lives misconstrue? Some hope Pence could be the answer, but he sold his soul to the devil and only adds to our cancer!  

I’m really not bitter, but isn’t it time to get rid of his twitter?
A time for those who may teach, to passionately beseech those with the power to impeach the one who is better suited for the beach, where innocent immigrants and dreamers will be out of his reach! 

Yeah, so this Valentine’s card may lack romance, but this guy’s election, such an unsavory selection, divisively taking the country in the wrong direction, worse than feared by many a projection, hard to know what might happen to my . . . !

Block it out though, I’ll certainly try; wanting to be your upstanding guy!

You are so sweet and always do your part, so turn up the heat and you can have my heart!


Bill Buffie is an internal medicine physician in Indianapolis, Indiana. He and his wife of forty years, Jo Ellen, are strong advocates for diversity and inclusion and find the current polarization of various factions in our country to be alarming.  Dr. Buffie has co-authored The Christian Pluralist:  An Invitation from the Pew, offering the perspective of lay people who question some of the traditional doctrine experienced through mainstream Christianity. In 2011, as part of LGBTQ activism work, his commentary, “Public Health Implications of Same-Sex Marriage,” was published by the American Journal of Public Health. He has plans to publish an illustrated children’s book later this year. Now dabbling in rap on some special family occasions, he is happy to share his romantic side as he offers this Trump-inspired Valentine’s Day Rap, written for Jo Ellen last year and recently updated in keeping with ongoing newsworthy events.

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